Secrets
by ObessedTWFan
Summary: Chapter 7. Don't Go. Sequel to Bittersweet Betrayal Bosco/Ashley Nick/Ashley mention of Sandle. Crossover with CSI:Las Vegas.
1. What happened then?

A/N: Sequel to Bittersweet Betrayal, song used is Nobody Knows by Kevin Sharp

* * *

3.5 years later

**New York**

**_I pretend that I'm glad you went away_**

His child would be not yet three, after he watched her drive off, never to see her again, he'd returned to the apartment, the empty apartment, nothing but his remained, while the furniture remained but everything that had made it home had disappeared, no smell of her perfume, no personal touches, not even a forgotten shirt nothing.

_**These four walls close in more everyday**_

He had walked into the bathroom to have a shower to try and wash all the grime of the hospital off him, when he saw something in the waste basket, it wasn't something that should be in there. A crumpled up piece of paper. He smoothed it out against the sink counter top. The hospital's logo was in the corner and what looked like test results.

It was good she didn't have anything, but then he saw how far along she was. She wasn't joking.

**_And I'm dyin inside but no one knows it but me_**

He returned to work shortly after his injuries, working doubles sometimes triples to get his mind off of things. It had worked for a little bit until he all he could think about was how she was doing and what cravings she had when she was pregnant. His mother had craved strawberries for him, and tomatoes with Mikey. Almost everything he did would remind him of Ashley, when someone cut him off he remembered her yelling at all the people who had cut her off.

_**Like a clown I put on a show**_

It had been over three years and here he was still pining away for her. What kind of person does that?

_**The pain is real even if nobody knows**_

Everyone had thought he moved on, moving through women like there was no tomorrow and he couldn't help comparing them to Ashley, some how all of them came up short.

**_And I'm crying inside and nobody knows it but me_**

He knew how his night was going to go, he was going to go home to their apartment, he couldn't part with the apartment. He some how hoped if he kept it the way she had, that one day she would come back it was silly but it was only a dream.

**_Why didn't I say the things I needed to say  
How could I let my angel get away  
Now my world is tumblin' down_**

He didn't know how much longer he could do this, how much longer he could burn the midnight owl, he was exhausted in every sense they was. He wanted her, he had searched in his down time, trying to find her, but she was an ex cop, she knew how it worked, if she didn't want to be found she wouldn't be. He came up with very little on that end so he broke down and hired a PI, which should be calling within the hour to give him some news. He'd hired the best, no matter the cost he had to find her and his daughter; he had a right to be in her life.

_**I can see it so clearly but you're nowhere around  
The nights are lonely, the days are so sad  
And I just keep thinkin' about the love that we had  
And I'm missing you and nobody knows it but me**_

Back to what he would do when he arrived at home, he would head home, on the way grab a pizza or Chinese whatever he chose, then he would grab beer out of the fridge then plop down in front of the TV and stay there until he was too tired to move then move to their bed sleep always claiming him instantly.

_**How blue can I get, you could ask my heart  
Just like a jugsaw puzzle it's been torn all apart  
A million words couldn't say just how I feel**_

Every so often he would go to a bar after work pick up some sleaze have a good few hours then the pain would settle back in, and he would no longer want to see the girl. The girl always got the hint, and left shortly after the deed had been done.

_**A million years from now, you know, I'll be loving you still  
The nights are lonely, the days are so sad  
And I just keep thinkin' about the love that we had  
And I'm missing you and nobody knows it but me**_

Thanks to Hayden he had seen what his baby girl had looked like, a little threatening that he would rip him limb from limb if he didn't show him the pictures that he had been showing Lamb at the time, Hayden had winced when Lamb had said who's kid it had been, he knew then Hayden knew exactly where Ashley was but wouldn't tell him, he was lucky that he had gotten to see the pictures, Hayden had even given him a copy. Saying that was the best he could do, Ashley would kill him if, Bosco had found out where the two were.

He looked at the pictures now, he'd forced Hayden to give him copies of every picture Ashley had ever sent him and it had to be over three dozen all in different stages of Lily's growth.

_**The nights are lonely, the days are so sad  
And I just keep thinkin' about the love that we had**_

He couldn't quite put a name to the emotion he was feeling, he had a daughter, someone who had been half him. Even had his nose and his baby blues. Time would tell if she have the same stubborn streak a mile wide that both he and Ashley both had. Once he had his information about his daughter. A smile always came whenever he said 'my daughter' he still couldn't believe that he had produced a real live human being.

_**Nobody knows but me**_

Naturally, when he first got the pictures he had made another copy for ma. Her eyes had filled up with tears when he had given them to her, she embraced him in a tight hug silently weeping. Her dream had come true; he had given her a grand child.

Through her tears she had quietly asked what her granddaughter name was. He couldn't stop smiling. He answered "Lillian Rose, but she's called Lily for short" a new batch of tears had formed in his ma's eyes and silently rolled down her already moistened cheeks. Then she sobered and asked where she was he had hesitantly told her that he didn't know and went on to tell her why Ashley had left. Ma had agreed with Ashley one hundred percent and scolded him for not going after her.

The day after that he saw Hayden and pulled him aside asking if he could get a message to Ashley he reluctantly agreed but told him if it had anything to do with his feelings then he wouldn't do it. Bosco had angrily told him no that it wasn't but to tell Ashley that his mother knew about Lily.

One week to the day, Hayden handed Bosco a letter addressed to Rose. No address or anything telling him that it had been sent to Hayden first and then he was to give it to him.

He watched how his mother's eyes had welled up again, as she read a letter then moved onto another page. The second page had been a picture drawn by Lily. It was nothing more than scribbles of colour but Ashley had printed what it was meant to be 'Lily and Mommy swimming' there was a big blue spot in the middle of the page he assumed that it was the water.

To the day the very picture hung on Rose's fridge showing off to her friends what her granddaughter did and the recent photo's that had been sent. Lily was growing up so fast. Which made him long for wrapping his arms around her and her mother too, and them welcoming him with open arms.

Now he sat on the couch, staring at the recent photo his mother had given him the day before. It had both Ashley and Lily in it, his mother's asking probably. She went on and on about wanting to see what Lily's mother had looked like. Only having just a glance at the hospital after the accident. Ashley had lightened her hair to a light brown; she looked incredible but then again always had.

He pushed away the cold pizza his stomach telling him that he needed a home cooked meal, not something covered in grease. Maybe another trip to Ma's she was always complaining that he didn't spend time with her, she was growing older everyday, she never knew what day would be her last. Yada yada yada. But she did have a point, before he went he wanted to meet his daughter and for her to know that he loved her very much.

He fell asleep staring at the picture of Lily and Ashley smiling into the camera, just before dawn.

* * *

**Las Vegas**

Ashley closed the door to Lily's bedroom half way, finally the little one was asleep, she had an ear infection for the last week, and it was a bugger to the medicine into, that's where bribing had come in, she had to promise to give her an ice cream cone or buy her a new toy, she knew it was wrong but, give anyone a two and a half year old, with an ear infection who cried at the top of her lungs because it hurt, and try telling her that by taking medicine would help get rid of it. Who ever came up with the rule about never bribing your kids to do stuff, obviously didn't have kids of their own.

She checked a glance at the clock, just past nine-thirty, Greg would be over for his evening meal. She cooked him supper while he took Ashley and Lily out for breakfast everyday, if he was working a double then lunch before he would go home and crash until next feeding time.

She filled a pot with water and put it on the stove thinking about where her life had turned out so far. She never thought in a million years that she had a kid, whom she loved more than life it's self. For that she was grateful that he had given her such a blessing, just wait until she reached puberty. Which wasn't for another ten years, grateful for that too. So many times she had thought about putting it up for adoption, even when she was in labour but the moment she saw the pink little face, she knew she couldn't and so this is where she was now. She grabbed the noodles from the cupboard and dropped two handfuls in.

Greg had been a lifesaver letting her stay with him until she found an apartment she liked, her luck was an apartment opened up right across from him, and she gladly took it. So know she had an apartment with a great view and nice size little patio, where Greg had a view of a brick wall. She let out a little laugh and glanced towards Lily's bedroom, no sound, good she wasn't awake.

She was glad she already had cooked the hamburg this afternoon when Lily had gone down for a nap, falling asleep watching a favourite movie of hers 'The Incredibles' it really was a good movie, Ashley liked it too, especially Edna Mole. She got out the sauce out of the tall cupboard and put that into another pot on the stove, the noodles just about done, she added the hamburg and a few spices to the sauce, which was almost done too.

She wondered how Bosco was doing, she knew it wasn't fair to keep him from his daughter but she wasn't going back. When Lily asked about her father then it was time to give Bosco a call, she just hoped that was thirty years from now but she knew she couldn't get that lucky. The questions would start sooner rather than later.

The door slammed sending Lily into a crying fit, she threw Greg and evil glare and he went to get Lily who had toned down for the time being. Giggles erupted from the bedroom and soon both appeared.

Ashley sat two plates on the table filled with spaghetti and put some garlic bread in the oven to cook for a few minutes. Greg was good with kids, which kinda surprised her because he was a little kid himself, which is why Lily and him got along so well. At the moment Lily was flying around the room, Greg making that happen. She shut off the oven and took out the bread and placed it on the table on a plate.

"Here mommy" Air Lily came flying towards her, she opened her arms and Air Lily smacked right into her, making her take a few steps back. Greg laughed and made his way over to the table to the food.

She put Lily into her high chair and got her a dish of Cheerio's; Lily started eating them one by one. Greg was about to take his first bite, when he spoke

"Oh I hope you don't mind, but I invited Nick, he got sick of me telling how good your food was" she threw daggers at Greg before, but was stopped when a knock was heard.

"Your impossible" she said to Greg as she got up and went to answer the door.

Nick and her did not get along, they could be in a room for five minutes or five hours and they were arguing about stupid little things, somehow he pushed her buttons even worse than Bosco did. Something about him rubbed her the wrong way, and she was the only one everyone else got along with him. _Then why do you get flustered every time you see him? I don't I just want to rip his head off every time I see him. _

She opened the door, the sight of him made her stomach flop.

"Hello Nick" her voice thankfully came out normal

"Ashley" he made her step out of the way, invading her personal space. And some how she liked it.

"Why don't you join us?" she said bitterly, Lily made garbled sounds, and Greg talking to her.

"Don't mind if I do"


	2. Don't Pretend You Do

A/N: Song used Away From Me by Puddle Of Mudd and the last little song verse was from Santa Monica by Theory of A Deadman  
New York

* * *

_**Look at me now  
**__**Just sittin here by myself**_

The latest sleaze had just left, he felt even worse than he did before he fucked her. His loved had turned to anger always did around this time of the week, by the end he always thought how the hell he could he think that of her? And went back to love her, buy why? It wasn't as if she was here, no she left him, and took his child with him, never to be heard from again.

_**And I think you found someone else  
**__**Now I'm going to have to find  
**__**A way to put the bottle down**_

He wasn't this kind of man who resorted to booze when he couldn't solve something he wasn't like his father. But he was no better; he should be doing more in finding them both. What's the use when he does find them, its not like Ashley would welcome him with open arms now would she? No she would refuse to talk to him, while they wouldn't really talk, they would scream and yell, until both were blue in the face and then they would be no further to the end from when they started. It was no use, he was damn if he did, damned if he didn't.

_**And why cant you see  
**__**That I'm drowning in a pool of misery**_

What kind of person was she? Leaving at the hint of trouble, she hadn't said a word after the kiss had happened she acted a little annoyed but that was it, hadn't even hinted that something was wrong.

_**I'm always afraid  
**__**That your gone  
**__**Away from me**_

He'd never been afraid of much, why be scared of anything that more than likely wouldn't happen? He knew how to swim, he always shut off any appliance so it wouldn't catch fire, and bugs didn't bother him. Why would they, they weren't even one one hundredth his size. It wasn't like anything around here was poisonous.

_**I'm always afraid  
**__**That your lost in somebody  
**__**I'm always afraid  
**__**That you're gone**_

But since he met her, she brought out new fears, fears that he didn't know he was capable of having. Like her getting hurt, or even worse dying. He actually cared for someone else more than himself. He was also afraid that he had lost her for good.

_**Away from me  
**__**I'm always afraid  
**__**That you're lost**_

If he fucked others then she surely would have too, maybe a few years ago, he heard that pregnant women get pretty horny. If he had been there, he would have made sure she had her fill and then some but he wasn't. So why wallow in self pity? Cant change the past. But he sure as hell could change the future.

_**So here I am  
**__**I don't wanna be by myself  
**__**And I think you're fucking someone else**_

The booze he gulped down a few hours ago were wearing off, he was becoming sober again which was not a good thing. He went to the fridge and grabbed another thinking back to one night in particular. Chocolate Whipped Cream summed it up pretty good.

_**Now I' m gonna have to find a way  
**__**To take the knife out of my back  
**__**And how could you leave me  
**__**Stranded in a closet full of bones**_

The thought of Ashley with another man, made his blood run cold, and to see red. She was his, and so god help them who ever else had touched her. It wouldn't be long before she would be begging him to take her. He was sure of it.

He didn't like the person he had become, and he had Ashley to thank for that. Did she know how much he was hurting because she just up and left without a backward glance, be damned of who she hurt in the process, as long as she got what she wanted, be damned of the consequences.

_**It hurts to breathe  
**__**Well every time that your not next to me  
**__**Her minds made up  
**__**The girl is gone**_

And she was never coming back.

* * *

**Las Vegas **

Ashley poured coffee into a mug and headed out to the patio, she was at the back of the apartment complex so she had a little privacy. She never really was a morning person but she somehow liked the quiet time before Lily woke up and the rest of Vegas, well Vegas never slept but it was just before everyone and thing woke up and began their day. She was talking about sunrise. The temperature wasn't too cold and wasn't to hot. And yet she hated this time to because this is where she always thought of Bosco and the life they could have had together. And everyday she always tried to push back the thoughts but somehow they always crept in and threatened to strangle her.

Whenever she pushed away the thoughts of Bosco, thoughts erotic thoughts of Nick flashed through her mind, and she pushed those away too, and thought about Lily, who should any moment would be waking up.

Her third cup of coffee made her stomach hurt telling her she needed food and to lay off the coffee. Breakfast would be soon enough. In the mean time she had to get Lily up, bathed, and dressed. Her earache seemed to go away, she had to thank Catherine for the tip, it had worked wonders and even got some antibiotics into Lily the doctor had prescribed.

Faint noises could be heard over the baby monitor Lily was awakening. She drained the last of her mug and got up ready to start the day.

She could have killed Greg, once again he'd invited Nick along to the breakfast no clue why, probably Nick's doing. She didn't know what he saw in her, and yet he had never given up trying to court her and she'd always turn him down.

Luckily a park was right near the apartment building which gave they spent all afternoon there. This is usually where she met Lisa, another single mother from the building two floors up. She had a boy, named Mark, he had just turned four a few months ago and always played with Lily, even at the young age he was, he looked after Lily, helping her up the ladders, and making sure she didn't stumble. It was actually kinda cute how protective he was of her.

She sat in the break room with Greg, having just brought him his wee hour snack he called it, Lisa had agreed to watch Lily while she made the trip and even offered to let her spend the night, no point in disturbing Lily's sleep. So Ashley agreed to watch Mark this afternoon while Lisa went to the doctor's and did few other errands.

It was amazing how much food Greg could eat in his wee hour snack. At the moment he was shoving in the potato salad she'd bought. In between bites he managed to speak

"You figure out what you want to do?" and went right back to shoving the food in his mouth. Nick had walked in to grab a cup of coffee before eh went back to work on the double murder case he was trying to solve.

"No I got lots of time" she looks at Nick's back and what a magnificent back that was "and money to decide so it's not like I need something right away"

"Must be nice" Nick mumbled to himself before taking a sip of coffee

"Excuse me?" Ashley asked, Greg trying his best to swallow the pile of food he had just shoveled in, he needed to break this up before it got any worse.

"I said it must be nice having money" he turned around, leaning against the counter taking another sip.

Greg finally swallowing the food that wouldn't go down fast enough

"Isn't your father a judge?" he stated more than asked, he knew that for a fact and was trying to point out that Nick had come from money too.

"We didn't have the money, not like the Ryan's did" he smirked into his coffee cup thinking he had won so far. Sara, Catherine and Warrick chose this time to walk in all in need of a little pick me up. In the form of coffee. They instantly felt the tension that was building between the two.

"Always warming up to daddy for money" that was the complete opposite of what she had done, when her father tried to warm her up, she shot and killed him. He wasn't going to touch her like he did Rachael. She stood up, she was not going to take this.

"You have no idea what my childhood was like" she said bitterly. She stood in front of him showing him, she wasn't the one to back down from anything.

"Oh I have a pretty good idea" he sits his mug down on the counter behind him. Sara, Catherine and Warrick look to Greg who was the closet to stop the fight before it got out of hand.

He got the hint and stood up. Standing on the side of them so they formed a triangle, Ashley tended to get a little violent when she was mad, just ask her ex husband, oh wait he was dead, never mind.

"Nick stop" Greg said in an I-mean-business tone.

"You don't know how I grew up so don't pretend you do" Ashley stepped closer

"Oh I know exactly how it was, the truth hurts doesn't it?" Nick said flatly. Greg saw the precise moment when she snapped and the loud smack of her hand against his cheek was the only noise made in the room for seconds. Ashley waked out, knowing if she didn't she would more than likely kill him. Nick thinking that they were on his side smiled

"What's her problem? All I said was the truth" the smile faded as Catherine and Warrick walked away, then Sara, it was Greg who stayed behind. Telling him he messed up big.

"That was low even for you"

Greg walked away in disgust.

Nick pondered the thought for a moment before going after Greg; he wanted to know the truth. He caught up with the younger man just before he walked into the DNA room.

"Greg hold on man" Greg stopped the look of disgust still evident on his face.

"How far out of line was I?" if Greg who never got mad at anyone, and was pissed off at him now, then he crossed the line, so far that the line was no longer in sight.

"A lot" that was all he said as he walked into the DNA room to talk with Mia.

She was not going to cry, he was just trying to rile her up, get her mad at him that's all. While he'd succeeded she was beyond mad, beyond pissed, almost passed furious too.

Her eyes welled up with tears, she wanted to murder someone and that person would be Nick. He had no right telling her that he knew what her childhood had been like. Asshole! She stomped her foot, dumb ass!

"You okay girl?" she glanced beside her, Warrick had come out and stood beside her

"Never better" she wanted to strangle him with her bare hands

"He can be an ass sometimes" Warrick told her

"I see that" if Nick thought he knew her childhood she was in for a rude awakening. She left Warrick standing there as she marched back into the crime lab.

Warrick knew whenever he saw, a women like that, it wasn't good. He quickly followed her.

Nick was coming out of the locker room when she came up to him and pushed him back into the locker room. She didn't want to yell this out, she didn't need the whole damn lab hearing what she was about to say, hell the rumour was still going around that Greg was the father of Lily.

"You think YOU know about MY childhood? Let me give you the condensed version. MY FATHER ABUSED ME, MOLESTED MY SISTER, AND THE DAY HE TRIED TO MOLEST ME I SHOT, AND KILLED HIM. MY MOTHER HAD ME COMMITTED BECAUSE SHE DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH ME. BY THE TIME I WAS FOURTEEN I HAD BROKEN MY LEGS THREE TIMES, MY ARMS TWICE AND HAD A DOZEN CONCUSSIONS ALL BECAUSE OF MY FATHER. THE ONLY REASON I STARTED TALKING TO MY MOTHER AGAIN FOUR YEARS AGO WAS BECAUSE MY SISTER WAS KILLED BY HER HUSBAND WHO I TO SHOOT TOO, TO SAVE BOTH MY NEICE AND NEPHEW FROM HIM. SO DO _NOT_ GO AROUND FLAUNTING THAT I HAD IT EASY BEAUSE I CAME FROM MONEY. AND I DON'T NEED _YOUR_ PITY"

That said she left him standing there in shock. He'd never felt guiltier in his entire life than this moment.


	3. Tutu

**New York**

Today had been a good day; work had kept him busy so he barely remembered his name, which was a good thing.

He rolled into bed, asleep before his head even hit the pillow.

_He was on a beach, surrounded by hundreds of other people, there for the same reason, to get away from the heat. The rays soaking into his skin, warming him all over._

**_She seemed dressed in all of me, stretched across my shame.  
All the torment and the pain_**

_He felt the blanket beneath him as he pretended to sleep, conversations from people drifting into his head, his thoughts, his dreams. _

**_Leaked through and covered me  
I'd do anything to have her to myself_**

_He heard giggling before he something plop down on him, wet and sandy. He opened his eyes, his sunglasses protecting his eyes. He took in the sight of his daughter who had now gotten off of him and playing in the sand beside him, attempting to make a sand castle._

_**Just to have her for myself  
Now I don't know what to do, I don't know what to do  
**__**When she makes me sad** _

_He sat up and started helping her clearing a space for the sand castle they were about to put down. Cool hands touched his shoulders, and a wet liquid touched his shoulders_

**_She is everything to me  
The unrequited dream_**

"_Your going to burn if you're not careful" a voice said into his ear as the person kissed it. The woman's hands roaming over his back, the cool liquid reaching everywhere until her hands were his lower back, then came around to his stomach playing with the hair at the top of his swimming trunks. _

**_A song that no one sings  
The unattainable, Shes a myth that I have to believe in_**

_His breath caught as her hands traveled lower to the sand below him, then disappeared, again then he felt the cool liquid over his chest trailed by soft finger tips. Slowly caressing his nipples as she rubbed in the lotion. _

_**All I need to make it real is one more reason  
I don't know what to do, I don't know what to do  
**__**when she makes me sad.**_

_The liquid touched the back of his neck next. She slowly kneaded the kinks out as she rubbed it in. Down over his shoulders and down his arms. Sending goose bumps down where ever she touched. _

**_But I won't let this build up inside of me  
I won't let this build up inside of me_**

_It was getting hard to concentrate on the task in front of him, but Lily didn't seem to mind as she filled her pail with sand. _

**_A catch in my throat choke  
Torn into pieces_**

"_You're supposed to be helping" the woman whispered into his ear again, as she got up and sat down beside Lily. Soon Lily and the woman was having a giggle fit before they raced off to the water together. The dream slowly fading away._

**_I won't, NO!  
I don't wanna be this..._**  
**_She isn't real  
I can't make her real_**

_He got up and chased after them, the warm water doing it's task of cooling him down. For now at least. He saw Ashley one last time motioning him into the water before the dream completely faded away. _

**_She isn't real  
I can't make her real_**

He woke up in a cold sweat and to a ringing telephone.

"Hello?" his breathing still a little rugged

"I've found her" the voice on the other end replied.

* * *

**Las Vegas**

Greg was late, twenty minutes to be exact. Lily was getting restless and so was her mother. If he was going to be late, he would always call, saying can we meet for lunch instead. Glad that they made a rule that they would meet at her apartment before they went out, so neither one would look silly waiting for the other.

The door flew open to reveal a very shaggy Greg; he needed a shower and a shave pretty bad. He didn't seem tired though, just the opposite.

"Guess What!" he was back to the old Greg, loud and perky.

"What!" she said with the same enthusiastism he had just said, not really feeling it but she liked to make fun of him

"The lab's looking for night time help"

"What does this have to do with me?" she did not like how his mind was working

"You can train then we could work together!" he reminded her of a little boy, telling his mother how he caught his first toad or did something exciting.

"Are you off your med's?" she asked worriedly

"You know I haven't taken anything since high school" some of his enthusiastism lost

"Why'd you stop taking them?"

"I didn't need'em anymore" his perkiness almost gone, he thought he'd come here with great news and all she can talk about is if he was on his med's or not.

"What about the training? I'm sure people are more qualified who are already done their training"

"Ya but no one's applied!" he seriously needed a girlfriend, make him loose some of his energy, eww she did not want to think of Greg in that way. She'd seen him when he was a scrawny eight year old.

"Okay, what do I do about Lily? Huh hot shot?"

"What about that girl –what's her name? Liza?"

"Lisa"

"That's it what about her?"

"I can't ask her to do that, I barely know her"

"So get to know her I can get Brass to do a criminal check on her"

She walked over to him and placed her hand on his forehead, he felt normal. Her eyebrows drew together in confusion, he was talking crazy. She picked Lily up and the diaper bag along the way.

"Oh, won't be around for supper, Got A Date!"

"Does the girl know?" she asked seriously, Lily at the moment was playing with Ashley's ponytail

"Lily stop" she pulled her hair out of Lily's sticky grasp.

"Mommy, mommy" Lily clapped her hands together and laughed, to what she didn't know, then Lily wrapped her arms around Ashley's neck tightly, then laid her head on her shoulder. Her thumb went into mouth sucking quietly. Lily would be out cold by the time they got to the restaurant.

The moment the car stopped Lily woke up, like she always did. She couldn't wait to go eat already reaching for her mother as Ashley undid the buckles to the car seat. She grabbed Tutu along the way. Tutu was a black and white pig with a tutu on. Once Lily had seen it she had begun to stay Tutu and so it because known as Tutu. The little pig when everywhere that Lily had gone, always crying if it was out of sight. And stopping the moment it was in her arms. Tutu had seen better days every day Lily tried to see if Tutu would eat her pancakes which were smothered in syrup. Tutu came into contact with his enemy Mrs. Washing Machine about once a week, twice if it really needed it.

Speaking of which Tutu sat on the table between Ashley and Lily in her high chair.

"Tutu. Tutu" Lily reached out for Tutu there was no way, Ashley was going to give it her, she was covered in syrup.

"Tutu doesn't want any, Mommy fed him before we left because pancakes gives Tutu a stomachache" Ashley picked Tutu up so it was right in her face.

"Tutu, would you like some pancakes?" Ashley made the pig shake no and Lily continued eating, every so often offering a piece to Ashley or Greg told her no, that she eat it.

"Is it really so bad to become a CSI?" Greg asked before shoveling eggs into his mouth.

"It seems a little weird, I mean I was a cop for over six years and now I'm changing that to become a CSI? It's just a little weird you know?"

He put piece of sausage into his mouth before answering.

"Ya but this way I get to see you"

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you have a crush on me" Ashley picked up Tutu and moved it out of Lily's grasp as the same time Lily reached for it.

"He's sleeping" and laid him down on the other side of her. Ashley slid her fork into a strawberry and caught Lily's attention with it, she zoomed it around until she let Lily take it off her fork and shoved it into her mouth.

"Yes Ashley I do" he was teasing her

"Why did you become a CSI? Hmm? Could it be a certain somebody?" leaving out the name of girl he really did have a crush on.

"No" he cut up a piece of sausage and put it on Lily's tray. Lily picked that up and shoved it in her mouth also. She had an appetite like her father.

"Well not the main reason maybe only forty percent" she glared at him

"Okay fifty percent but I love it"

"Because you get to work with her more often that not" she said matter of factly. Greg had never been able to lie to her, no matter how hard he tried, he either started smiling through it or had just given up after the glares she gave him that she didn't buy it.

"So what if I like her?" he'd given up and just admitted it after over five years of 'denying' it he said he liked her. Ashley always knew it so it wasn't really a secret or a lie.

"I'm just saying that you well, your hair for one, I liked it Spiky and two your clothes what happened to the" she had a hard time coming up with a word to describe his shirts. She'd settle with weird

"Weird… shirts you used to wear? Love changing you?"

"I just thought it was time that I grew up"

"You grow up, now that's funny" He was always trying to make people laugh, she didn't mean to be mean, ok well sometimes she did, but she never saw him growing up.

"I'm deeply hurt that you wouldsay that" she knew he was kidding, he was smiling the whole time he was saying it.

"Dun mommy dun" looked like she wore half of what she ate. Ashley had learned quickly if you're taking Lily anywhere; always bring at least two sets of extra clothes. Messes were attracted to her.

"Let's get you all pretty again" Lily was already reaching up for her mother to pick her up.

"I don't think so Mommy doesn't want to get messy too"

They walked off to the bathroom hand in hand.

* * *

It still surprised him somewhat that she was a mother, and in his opinion doing a great job. He could still see the look on his face when she told him she was pregnant thanks to the picture she took as she told him. A picture says a thousand words, he was feeling a thousand different emotions at that time.

He always pictured himself with kids first, don't ask why he thought that, it was just that Ashley wasn't the easiest person to get along with, _you wouldn't know it if the way she acted around the lab had anything to do with it _but he knew different, she was putting on a show, letting everyone believe that she was letting them in when in truth she was really barricading herself from them all. He didn't see why she had to do that, the people at the lab were, he wouldn't exactly use great but Sara, Warrick, Catherine and the majority of the time Grissom, which needed to let loose once and a while, up until recently Nick too, he thought they were good friends to have. But when Nick had hurt his best friend, he'd over stepped the boundary of friends and dropped down to a person he could tolerate if he didn't see him all the time. Which most of the time he didn't.

Nick and him had met twice since the little accident in the break room coincidently in the break room while they both were on break. Nick had greeted him both times, and he had completely ignored him. But had smiled when Nick had thought Greg had made his special coffee, the look on his face was priceless when he took a big gulp and realized it was the stuff the lab provided. Greg had walked away then, grinning to himself, he'd brought a thermos full of his special blend not risking the chance that the 'know it all' would get any.

He set about his task of cleaning the tray connected to the high chair, he always let on that the waitress had brought a new one after they left, but she knew and had thanked him more than once. He'd never raised a child so he couldn't tell if he understood what she was going though, he helped in any way he could, cause well raising a child on your own was hard.

He couldn't wait till Lily was grown up so he could teach her the fundamentals of music, teach her what was good and what wasn't, make her listen to good music not some popy music like Britney Spears or Jessica Simpson, although they had body's that make your mouth water they really couldn't get the point across of what they were singing, they were just started at.

He was of course going to take Lily out for her first drink at the legal age, and make sure that she didn't date until she was thirty. What was he saying? He wasn't Lily's father but had already stepped into the role, which he kinda liked.

He also couldn't wait to convince Ashley to get the training to become a CSI, it would be weird at first working together but, now that she was here, he wanted to actually see her and not for less than three hours a day. Sure he'd gotten past it before; when she had lived in New York and he here in Vegas but somehow this was different, he felt like she needed protecting and not just from the outside world but from Nick too.


	4. Junk Food

A/N: Never mentioned it last chap but the song was Vermillion Pt. 2 from Slipknot pretty cool song. Gonna have to omit Bosco for this chapter but don't worry he'll be in the next one, maybe even in the last one of these who the hell really knows, if I run out of thoughts then he will. Another pairing is going to take place and its going to be funny how its discovered but look at me (haha you cant) I'm already saying to much so here it is. I'm not exactly sure how long you have to go to school to become a CSI but everything will be explained. Also jumping ahead 6 months, and no I haven't gone crazy. Ok maybe I have but oh well, can't change that. There will be something happening in the nex few chapters, that well I'm not going to tell.

* * *

True to his word, Greg had asked Brass to run a background check on Lisa, only to find out she had a perfect record not even a parking ticket, or arrests. Lily spent the nights with Lisa and in the morning when Ashley was done would pick her up, if she had to work a double, which she did more often than not, Lisa didn't object. Lisa always told her that Mark did everything for her, like get her the toy she wanted and let her pick the daily movie all three of them watched, the movie would always finish just before Ashley arrived. 

From the background check Brass had run, Ashley learned exactly what Lisa did for a living, she was half owner of a bar not to far from here, she did the paper work for it so that meant she only had to go to bar about once a week and collect the papers. She had a small fortune, tucked away in a trust fund for Mark when he turned thirty.

Today was her last proficiency test, then she would be free to work on other cases with other people, working with Grissom was fine but he was rather tight lipped and left her to do most of the work, which she was fine with, that was part of her job description wasn't it?

Grissom was talking to Brass, as she scouted the area for evidence. It was a rather unusual foggy night in Vegas, no one had really noticed where the fog had come from it just kinda rolled in, under everyone's noses. Even the weather dude didn't know how it came about. Vegas was usually hot and dry, you need moisture for fog, which Vegas didn't have, not much anyways. And the temperatures weren't cool enough for fog. So like the mystery of life, where the fog had come from was still a mystery.

Tonight's case was a four year old that had been found stabbed, it riled Ashley a bit, knowing that Lily wasn't that far off from that age, only a year to go. Lily was turning three next week. At the moment she was following a trail of blood drops that she'd found in the alley, the lights and voices slowly fading into the night. She was at the end of the blood trail, she photographed it, then pulled the fiber that was stick in the middle of it. A purple one, the little child had been wearing a purple t-shirt. The main suspect in this case so far was the missing father. She didn't understand if someone didn't want a child, then why have one? If it was an accident, why not put the child up for adoption? Babies went fast. Why treat them like crap, in the system as bad as it was, they had a higher chance of turning out okay, then with a parents who treated them like crap.

Her knees protesting that she had been squatting too long, she stood, she heard the movement behind her the second that she was grabbed. One arm around her waist pinning her against someone the other arm holding a knife to her neck, she could feel the sticky substance on the knife pressing on her neck. No one knew she was back here, if she screamed for help, he would slit her throat, she had to try and stop him before he either killed her or dragged her off to kill her. Their missing suspect wasn't missing anymore. He smelled of cheap cigarettes and stale beer, and death.

"I never really liked kids you know" he whispered into her ear, his voice making her blood run cold

"Then why have one?" he held her tighter as she squirmed trying to throw him off balance.

"Her bitch of a mother ran out on us, leaving the little brat" he pressed the knife tip into her skin, any further and it would draw blood.

"Couldn't you put give her up for adoption?"

"No she's mine, MINE"

The yelling of mine alerted Grissom that something was wrong in the alley, so did Brass and a few other officers as they took off, careful not to wreck any of the little signs with plastic numbers on them. Light flooded the alley at once and they saw what had caused the yelling.

To anyone it was obvious that Ashley was scared shitless, the hard part was talking the man down, letting him release Ashley.

"SHE WAS MINE" he hollered into Ashley's ear, him still oblivious they were being watched now.

"I understand that, I wouldn't want anyone taking away my little girl" she whispered

"You have a little one"

"No" she lied "haven't meet Mr. Right"

"Let me give you some advice kid there is no Mr. Right out there only boys who want to get in your pants"

"Thanks for that, I'll be more careful" her arm brushed against her gun, normally she wasn't supposed to have one but, she had been a cop before so they allowed her to have one. She just wasn't allowed to use it, she was still on probation. _I think Ecklie would understand why I did._ Her hand slowly came up, if she threw suspicion his way, he would clue in, and take it from her, her chance of getting out of this alive would decrease even more.

"Let her go" Brass called over the distance, several officers's had their guns raised to them. One wrong shot and it could be Ashley who wound up dead. She caught Grissom's gaze and lowered hers to her gun, then back up, Grissom whispered something into the other man's ear and then Brass told his men to drop his weapons. Brass started talking

"If you let her go, we'll cut a deal"

"No nice try though, I know what kind of deal, lethal injection, instead of death row" trying to keep his attention on Brass and away from Ashley who's hand had almost reached the gun at her side, was failing as the guy grabbed her even tighter pulling her harder against him, she started over again. She unclasped the buckle. She glanced at Grissom again, he nodded his head so slowly that you wouldn't know he did it, if you weren't looking for it. Her hand dropped, as his brushed against hers. She waited as he secured his grip on her.

"Listen this is only going to get worse for you, so come on let her go" after that she zoned out everyone only hearing her own heart beat as she reached for her gun. She felt the cold metal weight in her fingers only one squeeze and this would be over. Grissom watching over her every move. Knowing that taking off the safety would make a small noise she cleared throat.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" he said quietly to her

"My throat's dry"

Just before she pulled the trigger, the guy caught on to what Grissom was watching and shifted as she pulled it. Pain instantly went through her leg and she saw blood coming out of it, she also felt his arms let go of her, her bullet had made it's mark, his foot. He fell to the ground grabbing his foot. While Grissom grabbed her and the paramedics came rushing over.

* * *

She sat in an ambulance, a blanket over her shoulders, she didn't know why it was at 75 outside but it was to keep the shock away. Which the med's were doing a fine job of. Grissom stood standing at the bottom, guilt clouded his eyes, if he hadn't being following her actions then the bullet wouldn't have grazed her leg. 

"If you don't mind I would like to finish the case, it is my last proficiency" surely there wasn't a more stubborn person in the state of Nevada who after grazing her own leg with a bullet wanted to finish up her case. He wasn't sure if that was a good CSI talking or a stupid one. And this case was also an open and shut case. An easy one.

"I don't see any problem with that, as long as your off your feet"

"That's the only thing I can do, after I get these to trace and DNA, I have to finish the report and wait for the results, cause the confession he made to me will not be admissible in court only hear say"

Now that was a good CSI talking.

Grissom carried both kits in, and told Ashley to lean on him so she could walk and she had come right out and told him

"I was shot, not crimpled" not exactly the truth the bullet only grazing her but still. She walked by herself unaided.

Hearing the commotion Greg and Sara came out of the break room, both facing looking a little flushed. Ashley smiled she knew exactly what they were doing.

"What happened?" Greg asked noticing how Grissom carried both cases, which should have been Ashley's job.

"Nothing really" she just wanted to get it over with, wanting no one to pity her for what she went through, but Grissom answered

"A bullet grazed her leg" thankfully leaving the part out that she had been held at knife point, Greg would go ballistic, he'd gotten protective of her over the last few years even if she was older. Sara saw the blood on her neck, that Ashley had tried to cover with her hair but she remained quiet. Seconds later Greg noticed it too

"Why is there blood on your neck?"

"My neck got itchy?" she said hoping he'd believe her, but he didn't and Grissom answered for her again

"The suspect held her at knife point" this was none of their business and here Grissom was telling anyone would listen, Greg did ask but dammit she should have the choice to tell who ever she chose to what happened and she would rather leave it be.

"He what!" Greg practically yelled, Ashley looked at Grissom

"I'm quite capable of telling them myself thank you" Sara and Greg stood in shock, they had never heard anyone basically tell Grissom off before. His response was to smile and reply

"I have to fill out the injury report, so I can tell whoever"

"Can I have my kit please?" he handed her a kit.

"I'm off to DNA and Trace" Ashley left them all standing there.

* * *

An hour later, Ashley half walked half limped, into the break room, everything completed, just waiting for the results so she could hand everything in, she looked around before going to a cupboard and reaching behind containers filled with various things. To the normal eye, it looked liked a cupboard full of containers that were found, but behind them were a big bag of marshmallows. She looked around again and reached in to grab a few, her own secret stash. All the other's had stashes. 

Greg had his coffee, which was in on the highest shelf in the cupboard right of the sink. Sara had her M&M's stashed in the little cleft under the table. Warrick had his stash of jujubes taped to the back of the fridge, Nick had his licorice in the cupboard to below the sink hidden behind the sink. Catherine had Milano cookies stashed behind the pop machine and Grissom, obsessed with bugs had Chocolate covered grasshoppers in fridge marked in a jar that said Pig brains. She actually was shocked that Grissom would eat bugs that he was so highly interested in but there was a first for everything.

She had no clue why anyone would believe that, the jar was a front, the middle had nothing it, except for his grasshoppers. Smart move. She had discovered that one day when she wanted to know what it had actually smelled liked and discovered the chocolate, she had looked around seeing no one had seen what she was doing she ate one and regretted it the moment she bit into it. She swallowed it with the help of water and wiped the jar clean of any prints. Just in case.

She had known whom they belonged to because she had seen each member come out of the break room at different times with something different. So she got curious and had started searching. And found them. She didn't know if the others knew where the other's stash was but if they did they said nothing. She grabbed a few more then closed the cupboard. Everyone was none the wiser. No she knew how everyone could to double sometimes-triple shifts. They were all junk food junkies!

"Something funny?" she spun around, she had a marshmallow in her mouth so she shook her hand no and begun to get herself a cup of coffee, slowly chewing, so Nick wouldn't know she was eating. She grabbed her coffee and sat rereading over the report that would decide if she was CSI material or not. She was not going to show him how much he bothered her, either way.

"I heard about what happened" he too poured himself some coffee

"Good for you, you actually listened for once" she moved on to another page.

She heard the soft click of a cupboard shutting then saw Nick bit off a piece of licorice and chew it slowly.

"Want some?" he held up a new piece

"No" her pager went off, she looked down at the message her DNA was ready.

"Meet me after shift" he said gently as he put the last piece of licorice in his mouth, as she stood and gathered her things.

"Why?" she looked at him and gave him a look that said she'd rather be somewhere else so make it quick.

"They're some things you need to know" they walked out together and went their separate ways.

"Normally I wouldn't do this but I moved yours up to the top of the list" Mia was pitying her, which made her on guard.

"Thank you" she said dryly, Mia unaware of the tone in her voice

"The skin underneath of the little girl's fingernails was the fathers, and the blood on the knife was the little girl's" Slam dunk, she took the results that Mia handed her, all she need was trace and she was gold. Speaking of the devil, Hodges came in, looking full of himself as always.

"Tell me what do Barney the dinosaur and Dora the Explorer's back pack have in common with the fiber I ran?" What the hell was he talking about?

"Their all purple" she already knew the girl's shirt was purple, she'd photographed it and taken it from David.

"Correct but only one of them matches the victim's shirt" Swish, swish another slam-dunk, the case was solved; the bastard was going away for a long time.

"Thank you Hodges" he stared at her blood soaked leg,

"Is there something else?" he looked up shaking himself out of it.

"No" he left.

"What scares me is that he knows about that stuff" Ashley told Mia before leaving.

She wanted to go home and sleep but she had Lily to look after, she seriously didn't know how she got any sleep with that child but she sensed that Lisa had something to do with so that Lily slept when Ashley slept. To do that Lisa would have to keep Lily up. One more year then Lily would be in school, full-time she could sleep then. It was a funny thing to wish for but hey she valued sleep as much as anyone.

Nick met her at the entrance; sleep the last thought on her mind. He was eating yet another piece of licorice, it amazed her how he didn't get cavities. His smile sometimes temporarily blinded her, this was a rare occasion when the sun was brighter than his teeth.

"You ready?" No, would she ever really be ready?

"As I'll ever be"

"Where are we going?" she asked following him to…her car.

"Well we're going to talk then drop me off at my place, cars in the shop"

"Here's fine" he pointed to a park not to far from his apartment. The car pulled to a stop.

"What's so important that we just had to talk?"

He swallowed before he answered, thinking now that his idea of telling her everything wasn't such a good idea anymore. But he did anyways

" Roughly six years ago I was working a case, the owner of the house was killed from his cable guy who was stalking him. The guy went missing, until I came up close and personal with the guy, he was in my apartment that night when I came home. A few months later a friend of mine was killed hours after I left, almost got charged with her murder cause I was the last one to see her alive. And about three years ago I got buried alive almost shot myself in fear I was never going to be found, I sometimes still wake up feeling ants all over me, in my hair, under my skin. And I still sleep with the lights on"

She didn't understand why he was telling her all this, it was none of her business

"And I keep telling everyone that I'm ok but sometimes the feelings just come back and overwhelm me until I can't breathe. I cant even close my bathroom door when I'm in there, sometimes the apartment is even to small for me and I started sleeping outside, trying to get rid of the feeling of being closed in"

They sat in silence for a few minutes before she spoke

"Why are you telling me this?"

"It's only fair"

"I don't need you or anyone else to feel sorry for me, that's why I don't tell anyone"

"Well if you had only told me about it" right she had just gotten through saying why she didn't tell anyone.

"I'm tired, so I'm gonna take you home now"

Carrying a sleeping child was not an easy task, it was nothing but dead weight and that weight strained her already tired muscles, he leg was in pain now. How many more times could she hurt herself before she became crippled? She had spotted Greg's car in its usual spot so she knew he was home but was he with Sara? More than likely. She stopped at his door for a few seconds before hollering through the door, all of the neighbors on this floor had already gone to work it was going on ten o'clock in the morning.

"Night Greg" she called through the door, she'd let them think that no one knew about them, but other's suspected they were but only she knew. All in good time.

Now if only she could find herself someone she'd be all set.

* * *

A/N: I'm starting to feel that no one likes this story is that true should I just stop now? 


	5. You Owe Me

A/N: Going to switch thingy's for a chap, meaning that Bosco's in the ending cause you'll see why. Used a favourite of mine Let Me Go by 3 Doors Down prolly going to use it again. Cause it's a good song.

* * *

"Grissom wants to see you" Sara said over a row of lockers as Ashley heard the closing of the woman's locker.

"Alright thanks" she told Sara then heard the locker room door close.

Within the next twenty minutes she would find out, if she was ever allowed to work solo on a case, if she was a CSI level one or not. She'd hadn't been nervous waiting to find out if she had passed the cop exam, she knew she had passed with flying colours, this was different. She had messed up on her first proficiency, she had misinterpreted the evidence and nabbed the wrong guy, only noticing the mistake after it was pointed out. Now or never, she closed her locker and took a deep breath.

She walked past the semi conference room where they had their pre-shift meeting and everyone was in there minus Grissom, because he was waiting in his office for her. All of them were laughing at something, no one noticing her looking in on them. She walked past them into Grissom's office.

It took him a few seconds before he looked up from a folder he was looking at. She tried to peer over and see what he was looking at but couldn't see anything without making it obvious.

* * *

"I'll talk you in a moment" he stood and grabbed the file and left. So maybe she didn't make it, if she did then wouldn't he talk to her first then give the meeting? Now she knew why no one liked waiting, other scenario's always popped into your mind. Now what she going to do? Look for another job? Well she could always wait until Lily went into school that way she could work in the day while Lily was in school or she could sleep while she was in school so many decisions.

"Sorry to keep you waiting" Grissom walked back into the room with another file, she wasn't to sure if it was the same one or not.

"Sorry about that" he seated himself down at his desk. The file open now.

"Let's get right the point" he closed his mouth, this was not getting to the point.

"Okay"

"Congratulations" congratulations? Congratulations? CONGRATUALATIONS?

"I passed?" Grissom nodded

"I passed?" this was a sick joke, one she didn't like

"I wouldn't say it, if it weren't true"

"I" she pointed at herself "passed?"

"Yes" Grissom had never seen anyone so happy about passing before

"I PASSED!" she was one I passed from jumping up and down.

"That's what I've been trying to tell you" he paused for a moment then continued "I don't have a case that you could work solo on but go see if Nick needs any help with a DB on Henderson"

"Sure thing"

"Take a jacket it looks like rain" he said but she had already left

* * *

By breaking a few speeding laws, Ashley arrived minutes after Nick, who at the moment was grabbing his kit from the car and looked up when Ashley drove up. On the drive over she had verbally scolded herself, she had acted like a teenager who had just gotten their learner's permit. She had calmed down by the time she'd pulled up to the crime scene. She smiled to herself as she extracted her kit from the back seat. When she turned around she almost ran into him, he was so close, and wore a smile.

"So?" She thought Grissom would have told him, everyone before her, make her wait while everyone was sworn not to tell her. That didn't happen.

"So what?" she asked back trying to seem innocent that she didn't know what he was talking about

"Did you pass?" she couldn't help but notice a gleam in his eye, he always had one, when he was around her or so she thought, she didn't know if he had one when they weren't together but she couldn't exactly find that out without raising a few red flags.

"I'm working with you aren't I?" she was not going to tell him, not yet anyways, she'd wait to see if he really cared then drop a hint or too. She a cruel person and she loved it.

"What have we got?" Nick asked Brass as all three walked over to David

"Thomas Steele, 45, found by his neighbor Tabitha Grady"

Ashley squatted beside David who at the time was writing on his clipboard.

"Didn't find much only his wallet and a bunch of keys" David told them

"I can see what killed him" Nick said as he took pictures of the guy and the screw driver sticking out of his chest.

"You would think that but, that was post mortem, blunt force to the back of his head is what killed him"

"I'll be outside" Ashley stood up and clicked on her flashlight

"You may want to get a few shots of the crowd, not too many live out here if you know what I mean" Nick said has he moved off farther into the barn.

Ashley pretended that she was taking pictures of the ground but at the last second raised it up, and took of the crowd. That done she started looking at the ground. There was a lot of grass clippings mixed in with the gravel. She reached the edge of the grass, it had been mowed recently, maybe even today. She'd have to wait for David's calculation of TOD before any accusations were made. She saw small tire marks, coming off the grass; she was back at the barn when the trail stopped. She started walking the rows, nothing but exotic cars lined the walls, and then she found it, the lawn mower. It was cool, but it had been run, recently.

Brass was talking to a woman in her nightgown and curlers, when Ashley walked up.

"Ashley Ryans, Tabitha Grady" Ashley nodded

"Ms. Grady, did Mr. Steele cut his own grass?"

"No he had some college kid do it, but what does this have to do with anything?" Ashley walked away.

"Liver temp was 70.65 he's been dead about 11 and a half hours" It didn't take a lawn mower twelve hours to cool. She walked back out to the edge of the grass and walked and followed the trail. She walked past the cars, every car she looked over her shoulder, she could see where the guy every time then she walked over to the lawn mower and turned around, a clear view of the guy. There is no way the guy couldn't have seen that.

She dusted the lawn mower for prints and came up with five good ones, two palms and thirteen smudges.

"You check outside?" Nick said as he came up behind her

"Ya not much there" She took a few photo's of the mower and tried moving it, it was stuck.

"Help me with this" She pulled while he pushed finally with one last pull it came free, from the wall.

"why do we need, the lawn mower?" Nick stood back up

"Feel it, it doesn't take half a day to cool down"

"Your grasping at straws"

"No I have a firm grasp" he was close to pissing her off

"You care to make a little wager on this case?"

"Making a bet who killed the old guy?" she said disgustedly

"Okay never mind" Nick backed off, she was not one to mess with the dead.

"How much we talking?" Ashley asked curiously

"Well if I win I get to take you on a date"

"If I win, then you have to be my slave for a day"

"A sex slave?" Nick's voice filled with hope

"No. I think the college kid did it"

"Well I think the neighbor did"

"Okay then let the best CSI win" they shook hands

* * *

"You owe me dinner"

"You owe me slave duties" was said at the same time two days later as Ashley slid a folder to him.

"I was right, the college dudes finger prints were all over the hammer"

"The neighbors were on the screw driver" he picked up the folder and looked through it

"The screwdriver was put in after he was killed, I win!" she placed her elbows on the table and leaned forward.

"I expect the duties to be fulfilled" she smiled showing her own perfect smile

"Remind me again what exactly I have to do" he too leaned forward

"Anything I want you to do" she leaned in even closer so his breath fanned her face blowing her stray hairs away from her face.

"And what about me? I was right too" she licked her lips; he would like to take those lips in between his, if only for a brief second.

He was going to kiss her, she knew it, and she wanted it. A slight move of the head and he would be.

"Ahem" they both jump apart, Ashley laughing a little too much to her self

"I thought you might like to know that, one Tabitha Grady and Blake Clear are mother and son" Brass told them, Nick not meeting his eyes, Ashley still laughing

"Look likes I get my dinner after all" Nick said to Ashley, who was having trouble breathing from laughing so much

"I'm not going to bother to ask" Brass said as he turned and left, Ashley followed him out with Nick in tow. Her laughing had calmed down, and now smiling.

* * *

"I'll pick you up at eight Friday" Nick said as both he and Ashley walked out of the interrogation room, they cracked the case, they both killed him. Tabitha had given him untraceable pills, while Blake cut the grass, making sure no one knew where his mother was, then once Tabitha had left, Blake finished the grass and put the mower away and whacked the guy, leaving quickly. He would have gotten away if he hadn't cut the grass.

"And you can start your duties on Monday" seeing as how no one had won, they both agreed that it was best if they both did what the other wanted.

Ashley knocked on Greg's door, he could be sleeping knowing her luck he would but was grateful when she saw him. Shirtless no less but he was there looking like he had just woken up.

"I need a favor"

Ashley? What time is it?"

"Seven thirty. I need a baby sitter for three hours tops"

"WhataboutLisa?" came out in one coherent word

"She can't take Lily until we start work please. Normally I would use this as an excuse but a deal's a deal. Please?"

He looked behind him into his apartment

Sara was there! Hehe, under normal circumstances she wouldn't have asked but well she was desperate.

"Fine, but I don't have to change diapers or anything?" He shifted from one foot to the other

"Lily is potty trained"

"Can I put her down in your guest bedroom or something she's getting heavy" she hoisted Lily higher on her hip.

Greg moved to take Lily from her but she stepped back

"I think I should do it"

"I can take her"

"Now Greg why wouldn't you want me in there?" she asked in a comical tone "Is it because your apartment's messy? Or is it because you and Sara don't want me to know she's in there? What ever could it be? Hmmm I just don't know Hey Sara" she pushed her way past Greg and his door right into the guest bedroom paying no attention to Sara like she was supposed to and saw nothing there. She came back out and a drink from the fridge and finished half of it before saying anything.

"I should be back in lots of time before shift starts so you don't have to worry about that, in the weird circumstance that I'm not, Greg could you run her to Lisa's? You know where she lives" she finished the other half of the drink and walked to the door, with it opened she said

"Nice erection Greg" and she shut the door behind her.

* * *

"See I can be nice when I want to be" Nick walked Ashley to her door and she turned leaning against the door

"I did have a nice time tonight, thank you Nick"

"Have I told you, you look amazing?" he had when he picked her up, in the car ride to the restaurant, during supper, the ride here and right now.

"No I don't think you have" both smile knowing she's trying to help him, with not embarrassing him. So he said she looked great a few time, more than a few but it was true she looked stunning.

"There's something that I wanted to do since I looked at you" kiss her senseless until they both forgot their names.

"Really what would that be?" was said with the best innocent voice she could muster. He stepped forward and placed his hands on her waist the silky fabric of her top catching against his calloused hands.

He doesn't hesitates and just goes in for the kill and kisses her. Her hands slowly come up his arms to rest on his shoulders.

"I think we should do this more often" he said against her mouth, his breathing a little rugged. Not having the ability to talk she nods. His lips come down to hers once again.

_**One more kiss could be the best thing  
But one more lie could be the worst  
And all these thoughts are never resting  
And you're not something I deserve **_

In my head there's only you now  
This world falls on me  
In this world there's real and make believe  
And this seems real to me

"Ashley" Ashley pulled away immediately, hearing Greg's tone, something was wrong, she even stepped away from Nick, wiping her lips in the process.

"What's wrong Greg?" trying to get her breathing down to normal

"Is something wrong with Lily?" the kiss long forgotten

"No not exactly" she did not have time to play his usual games she would like to get back to doing what she had been abruptly interrupted from

"What do you mean not exactly?"

"Well on your end its all good but on his end its not"

"What the hell are you talking about?" she was getting frustrated not knowing what the hell Greg was talking about

"Someone that shouldn't be, well he does have a right to be here, is here"

"What the hell does that mean?" Why wouldn't Greg just tell her.

"It means I'm here" another voice said a very familiar voice that she never thought that she would be hear again, was standing not three feet from her now. Bosco had come. She wanted to faint but only swayed a little all three reaching out to steady here, she pushed each one of them away.

"I can take Lily to Lisa for you" Greg said as he left to return to his safe haven at the moment his apartment, lucky bastard she was stuck with a new flame and an old one who had produced a child.

She unlocked her apartment, wanting to be mean and just go in her apartment and slam the door in both their faces. But she couldn't do that, the day she had been dreading for over four years had finally come and she couldn't go stick her head in the sand.

"Bosco I'll meet you inside" he tried to read her emotions but she had some how built up a wall turning off her feelings. He walked past them both into the apartment, if she wanted some time along with Mr. Hunk outside then she was going to have to do it herself, he left the door open. Not even a minute later she reached in and closed the door. She took his hand and walked him to his car, away from prying eyes and ears.

"Tonight was great, it really was but I don't think we should go out again. You don't have to fulfill your slave duties"

"What?"

"It's just better if we end things now, it'd be better for the best of us"

"Better for the best of us? More like better for you"

He got in his car vehicle and drove off.

**_You love me but you don't know who I am_**  
_**I'm torn between this life I lead and where I stand  
**__**And you love me but you don't know who I am  
**__**So Let me go  
**__**Let me go  
**__**

* * *

**_

It was quiet when she went in, hoping that Bosco had gotten the hint and taken off. No such luck he was looking through a photo album she had left on the table, she had been putting new pictures in it this morning.

How did one start talking about something like this? You couldn't start the conversation with why the hell did you walk out on me? Could he? You bet he was going to.

"Why did you leave?" his voice bitter, it was better that way, she wouldn't know how he felt, she didn't deserve it.

"The note explained everything"

"It explained nothing, it told me you were a coward, that you leave at the hint of any problems in relationships"

"I didn't cheat on you now did I?"

"She kissed ME!"

"But you didn't push her away, I sat in your room for over two hours and not once did you bring it up or even hint at it"

"It wasn't that big of deal"

"It WASN'T THAT BIG OF DEAL? ARE YOU NUTS?"

"Nothing happened well we were together"

"And why am a I supposed to believe you? You lied to me"

"And you didn't? I had to find out from an ex of yours that you had one, that we had one"

"Because you didn't deserve to know"  
"I didn't deserve to know? Of course I deserve to know we're talking about flesh and blood here!"

"Well we both messed up" he couldn't believe it, admitting she was wrong so early into the argument, she admitted he was too which is true. He should have told her.

"If you think that I'm going to let you take her away from me again, you are sadly mistaken" he told her, amazed that only once they had spazzed out. This was new for the both of them.

"I never said I was" she tried staring him down but they both were stubborn as mules and neither looked away.

"I intend to have everyone right I'm allowed with this child"

"Why now? Why are you here after all this time why now? Has it taken you this time to find us? You're a cop Bosco you could have found us if you really wanted to"

"I searched every day for two years, looking for you, you didn't wanna be found" that part was true. But he didn't need to know that.

"You never answered my question, why now?"

"Because I've had enough, I'm here to take you and Lily home, with me where you belong"

"Lily and I are staying here"

"What will it take? Me saying I love you? Okay I love you, there I said it, I love you. I should hate you but I do, I love you, it killed me when you left. I have never felt this way and finally I said the hell with it, I'm going after her" she was touched but couldn't help but wonder what he had to gain from this besides her and Lily

"I know you still have feelings for me too" she stood up closing the distance between them

"If I did which I don't I'm not going to act on them"

"Like hell"

"This some new and improved Bosco?"

"That depends… do you like him?" he kissed her with everything he had been feeling for the last four years.


	6. Decisions, Decisions

She kissed him back for what seemed like an eternity before reality settled in and she pushed him away

"What are you doing?" tears blurring her vision. Her fingers came over her swollen lips, no she didn't want this did she?  
Years ago, hell even a few months ago, she would be ecstatic if he had come confusing his undying love but now she wasn't as sure.

"Why now Bosco?"

"Why not now?"

"I don't think I can do this"

"Do what? Of course you can do this, I'm here now"

"It's not always that easy" she had to put distance between him and her, she went to the far end of the living room.

"This time it is"

"No it's not"

"And why isn't it?" he said rather calmly which sent a whole new scared feeling into Ashley's chest

"BECAUSE I'M NOT SURE IF I WANT TO BE WITH YOU!" there she said it, something that had been on her mind for the last few months.

**_Do you always have to tell him everything  
On your mind?  
You know that too much honesty can be  
So unkind_**

She could actually pin point the moment he lost it, and for the first time she actually believed him, when he had said she meant everything to him. She had and now she had gone and broke his heart. She was no better than Yokas and Cruz, at least she hadn't cheated on him.

This was for the best, she had a solid reason for not wanting to get back together with him, then why did she feel dirty and despicable? The one hundredth and sixth way to make Bosco and Cruz pay came flashing back

_Rip out his heart and stomp on it_

She had twisted it, ripped it out, stomped on it and fed it to the wolves. She'd sunk to a new time low. He'd confessed he loved her, and what did she do? She told him she didn't want anything to do with him.

"Can I see her?" came out in nothing more than a whisper, giving evidence what she already knew.

"She's at a babysitters now, how about you come back around noon?" if she could take back what she said she wasn't sure she would, it made the pain more bearable instead of dragging the pain on and in months telling him. This was for the best.

**_And every time you throw him to the floor  
Why are you surprised to see he's breakable? _**

He nodded, not seeing any more reason to stay he left.

**_You always try to find what's holding him  
Away from you  
But do you ever see your anger standing there  
Right between you?_**

And that was why he didn't confront her till now, he always self-consciously knew that she would say that. But even if he did know that it still didn't make it any easier, he had some serious thinking to do, even more than he thought he ever had to do. What was he going to do know that Ashley and Lilly wouldn't leave Vegas; you always had to take every possible scenario into effect. He had two weeks to decide what he was going to do. 

She sat with her knees up, in her special spot with a cup of much needed coffee, staring at one point until the early morning hours, and realizing a new day had started. She took a sip of the coffee, forgetting that it would be cold by now, the bitter taste in her mouth reminded her quickly. She didn't move though, she just dumped the contents of the mug on the grass next to her. She also sat down the mug on the grass and continued to stare off into space.

"Where were you last night?" Greg came up beside her, pulling up a chair next to her and handing her a coffee. Which she didn't take so he dropped his arm and held it for the time being.

"Something go wrong with the date last night?" still getting no response to her he said something that usually got her going

"Last night was slow, so we brought in some purple monkeys and had hot passionate monkey sex for hours"

"I didn't mean to" she whispered, so low he thought he imagined it

"You say something?"

"I didn't mean to" her voice higher now, still staring at a blade of grass that hadn't moved. She turned to him, tears streaming down her face

"I really didn't mean to Greg" he hadn't seen her cry often except when she was pregnant so he knew what ever she hadn't meant to do was a big one. He reached over and took her in his arms, her sobbing into his shirt.

"Did something happen between you and Bosco?" she nodded into his shirt.

"I'll kill him"

She laughed through her sobbing

"No you won't" she hugged him tighter, she could always count on him to help her through what ever came her way.

"You ready to talk about it?"

"No. This is something that needs to be done on my own"

"Then why do I still feel like killing him?"

"It must have been all that monkey sex you had last night, wasn't Sara jealous?" boy did he feel embarrassed. He thought quickly

"No she was too busy to notice she had the leader of the pack named Bubba"

"Well at least she had somebody"

"She wants to talk to you seeing as how you weren't in last night"

"I gotta go pick up Lily" she stood, bent over to pick up the mug. She disappeared into the apartment and returned moments later to be met with Nick and Greg.

**_And every time you throw him to the wall_**  
_**Why are you surprised to see he's breakable?**_

I'll go pick up Lily for you" Greg said an he left, he was a lifesaver one minute, and a spear in the neck the next. She noticed how both coffees were left on the table.

"And how are you this morning Nick?" Ashley asked with false emotion

"Oh you know not to bad, I got dumped last night"

"Didn't know you were dating anyone"

"It really didn't get off the ground" this is the part where she told him if he liked her go after her. But she knew who he was talking about, as much as she wanted him to, it wouldn't be fair to get him tangled up in this.

"I'm not going to choose" because either way she did, she would hurt someone who didn't deserve to get hurt.

"Between him and me?"

"Ya its not fair to either of you"

_**Tell the world that he's breaking your heart  
**__**Go tell the world nothing's ever your fault  
**__**Go tell them all

* * *

**_

"How long you staying in Vegas?" Ashley asked the person sitting beside her.

"Two weeks"

"How would you feel If I came back to New York with you?" she watched Lily at the top of the jungle gym sliding down the slide.

"I would say how soon can we leave?" he chuckled "I'm kidding" he added quickly seeing her face fear stricken.

"Only for a visit" his shoulders sunk a bit, and disappointed overflowed into his baby blues.

**_And every time you throw him to the floor_**  
_**Why are you surprised to see he's breakable?**_

If you tried to be early, you were always late, Ashley was about five minutes late after spending almost half an hour looking for her keys. She had meant to get here early so she could find out what Sara wanted, but the god's had other ideas, she was thankful she didn't have to drive Lily over to Lisa's house, Bosco had offered to watch her. Which meant all he would have to do is be there, if Lily ever woke up. Lily never did she was a sound sleeper just like her father. A blow horn right beside his ear couldn't have woken up, she knew that cause she had tried one day.

Grissom was handing out assignments as she walked in, they all looked at her but Grissom pulled them back to him.

"Nick and Greg, triple homicide, Warrick a jewelry store robbery and Sara and Ashley a drive by shooting"

"Lucky" Greg tells them both as he and Nick walk out together, Warrick follows Sara out.

"Grissom?"

"Yes"

"I just wanted you to know that what happened last night will never happen again, it was irresponsible of me"

"It's alright, Greg told me what happen" her knight and shining armour

"Don't you have a drive by to get to?"

"Yes sir"

* * *

"Last night you didn't see anything did you?" 

"Other than the fact that you were sitting on his couch in one of his shirts nothing, oh he does need to water a few of his plants" she glanced over to the older woman beside her, who insisted that she drive, she'd worked with Sara a couple of times and every time, Miss Sidle always got the keys and was in the vehicle before Ashley had even grabbed her kit. She was panic-stricken.

"I'm not going to tell anyone" Ashley told her reassuringly

"Why would you do that?"

"Do you want anyone know?" she asked stupidly,

"It's just anyone else would be jumping at the chance to gossip about"

"What ever happens behind closed doors, stay's there" god knows she has skeletons in her closet that were better left untouched.

"Your okay with it?"

"Why wouldn't I? I'm not in love with Greg, and sorry to hurt your feelings but I'm not interested in you either, I don't swing that way. Although there was this one time…" she tried off, noticing Sara's face again

"I'm kidding" maybe she should try and scare people more often cause it was fun looking at them, when they thought she was crazy.

"Can I give you some advice? Well its kinda really a favor"

"As long as I can give you some too"

"Sure"

"Okay shoot"

"When you're with Greg could you kinda keep it down? You're kinda loud." Her face reddened.

"How loud?"

"Loud enough that I can understand what your saying. Oh Yes, Don't Stop Loud" the older woman's face turned to a deeper shade of crimson.

"Don't worry I'm the only other one on the floor in the daytime, its just you never know"

"I'll try and keep it down"

"Alright what's your advice" Ashley glancing out the window seeing that they were almost in the neighborhood, outskirts of Tranytown. She was glad that both of them had guns.

"Nick's a really good person"

"Behind closed doors Sara" she was not in the mood to talk to her about Nick or any other person in her life at the moment. Something's were better left unsaid. Sara stopped the car, they were here no time to talk. She was staying alive! Haha she really had to stop this, she wasn't far from getting committed. Or just get some sleep so she wouldn't do that, when was the last time she slept? Hmm.. she couldn't remember.

"Nick is just a really good person" Sara said and then left her to go process the scene. The truth was she already knew that.

* * *

Bosco sat in Ashley's apartment looking at the photographs, so much he missed out on. That was all about to change he would, make her see that she belonged with him in New York. But how? That was the question, how do you get a stubborn woman to stay in a place she left? He could make her remember all the good times they had together. But with the good would bring the bad. And that's exactly why Ashley moved away. 

He glanced at the clock, Ma would have his hide if he called this late, but chances are she was still awake having coming home from work. They were three hours ahead of Vegas so it would be around 2:30 in New York, better late than never.

The voice on the other end sounded wide-awake when it answered

"Hello?"

"Hey Ma it's me"

"Ah Maurice, is everything ok?"

"Everything's fine, just calling to see how you are"

"That's a trick question, I'm an old woman Maurice, my bones and joints ache and arthritics is starting to set in" He could always count on his mom to take any conversation and turn it about herself.

"So how is Lilian?"

"Lily's fine, she's even more gorgeous than in the pictures"

"You were always like that too"

"And how is her mother?"

"Ashley's doing great, she's a wonderful mother"

"I never doubted that but somehow I sense there's more to it than that"

"She wont leave Vegas, she's coming back to New York for two weeks with me, but then her and Lily are going back"

"And you don't want that?"

"Of course I don't! If that happens I wont see Lily again"

"There are things called pictures, letters, telephone's, and email"

"It's not the same Ma"

"So what are you saying?

"I really don't know"

"Well it was about time I got out of the city anyway, it's making me feel old, some sun would do me good"

"What are you saying Ma?"

"I'm saying what ever you think I'm saying"

"What I'm thinking is that your saying 'Vegas here I come'"

"I always knew you were smart, you should show it more often" never fails every chance she gets, she always teases.

"Ma"

"Alright I take it back, you did after all snag a good woman to have your child"

"Yeah I did. Who would have thought that I Maurice Boscorelli, would have a kid?"

"Not me that's for sure, I was getting worried"

"So how is the city?"

"You've been gone for two days, it's the same as it was two days ago, cold"

"It's nice and sunny and warm here"

"Be careful what you wish for"

"And what am I wishing for?"

"That I'll come out there, you know I got some money saved up, wouldn't hurt to see if I could double it"

"Don't get any bright ideas"

"All I'm saying is.."

"I think if you showed up too, Ashley would think we're crowding her"

"I never thought of that"

"Well I better let you go Ma"

"Call me in the morning"

"Sure thing Ma"

"Give Lily kisses for me"

"I will"

He sat the phone on the coffee table in front of him. This was all so new to him, he didn't know if he could do it, help raise a kid, that he knew nothing about. He couldn't really help raise her if he was on the other side of the country could he? He could he really give up everything he had in New York and move here? What did he really have in New York anymore beside Ma? A job he now hated, cause Ashley took all the fun out of it when she left. People who couldn't stand him, some even feared him. Seriously was it really worth going back out there?

But would Ashley really give him another chance? It was only a kiss, a kiss he forgot to mention on purpose. But was his really so bad compared to what she had done? She had failed to mention she was pregnant, and that she saw him kissing Cruz. She had fled the state never to be heard from again. All for one stupid little kiss that shouldn't have happen. _But it did. _He was thinking with a lot of buts, could he be starving for sex? No that wasn't it.

"Daddy?" Lily rubbed her eye with one hand while, holding a pig and blanket. Now he knew how Lily slept, in a big kids bed, wasn't that a decision they should have decided on together? He didn't think Ashley would like it too much if he second-guessed her. He had to hand it to the kid, one look at him and she knew who he was. He didn't really care as long as she wasn't calling anyone else Daddy.

"Yes pumpkin?"

"Mommy?"

"Mommy's gone to work is it okay if I stay here instead?" he saw the little girl trying to get a grasp on what he said, she finally nodded.

"Do you wanna watch some TV with me?" again the girl nodded, he held his arms out to her, she went to him willingly. He could get used to this.

* * *

They were still on square one with their case as both Ashley and Sara left. Ashley had made sure Sara had left before her, so that way if their was anything to be found out they could do it together, no one having the upper hand on things. She left right after, she watched Sara get into her car, just to be sure she followed the older woman to her apartment, get out of her car and climb into a waiting car. She followed that too, knowing exactly who's car it was. So this is how they were pulling it off. 

Greg was waiting for her when she walked up to her door, with a bag of groceries, she hadn't really needed them, they just explained her absence.

"Something I can help you with Greg?"

"I just thought I saw your car following us"

"Couldn't have been me, I've been getting groceries" she hoists the bag higher to make her point. He looks at her pondering the thought, not really believing her.

"Well you two have fun" she nods, and unlocks her own door, hearing no movement from Greg she turns.

"Something wrong?"

"It was you"

"Prove it" she smiled, and walked into her apartment.

She found both Lily and Bosco asleep on the couch, Lily on top of him curled up with her blanket and Tutu. It was a cute sight, too cute of one to let it go to waste. She grabbed the camera from the desk drawer, and snapped a few without stirring either one. She got out a blanket and laid it over the both of them. Exhaustion finally setting in she yawned. She placed a kiss on Lily's temple, pushing a few stray hairs out of the way, then she did something without thinking, she kissed Bosco's forehead and went to bed herself.

* * *

A/N: Breakable by Fisher 


	7. Don't Go

A/N: With my vow to finish all my stories I've decided to continue with this story I started over two years ago. It sat for quite awhile without any reviews and then all of a sudden I had five so I thought what the hell and decided to pick it up again. If I get none then maybe I'll put it on the back burner and finish some other things first. Tell me what you think of it. I know it's more Ashley than Bosco in the next couple of chapters but Bosco makes a comeback don't you worry.

xXx

Ashley drummed her fingers against the table as she waited for her results that she was promised would be ready any second now. She'd given up on small talk a few minutes ago and just patiently or what she hoped appeared patient waited.

"Drumming won't make it go faster" the lab tech told her with a brief glance up she looked down again watching the table her fingers were on. Just as she looked down again the beeping started alerting both of them the results were being printed. The lab tech was just about to hand over the results when Nick came barreling through the open door.

"I wanna know" both turned their heads to the intruder as if he was mad

"What do you wanna know?" Ashley asked confused last time she checked Nick's case didn't need tox. She smiled her thanks to the tech as she walked out Nick hot on her heels.

"I wanna know why you think it's okay to break it off"

"We had one date –" she paused as a few people walked by "It's not like we've been dating for the last six months"

"Tell me you didn't feel anything" she delays her answer as another set of people walk by all nodding their heads in a silent hello.

"What I did or did not feel has nothing to do with why I broke it off with you"

"So you did feel something" she stopped mid stride to look up to him, more people walked by and she walked into the first available room it just happened to be the locker room. How far had they walked?

"Nick it's just really not a good time for me to be starting up a relationship"

"Everything was fine until Lily's dad showed up then it was the heave ho with Nick"

"His name is Bosco and I walked you to your car instead of saying goodnight and walking off inside my apartment. How is that giving you the heave ho?"

"You dumped me"

"One date Nick, one date we were not in a relationship"

"We've been in some sick demented relationship the day you arrived in Vegas"

"Now you've gone and lost it" she crossed her arms, staring up at him the bench separating them.

"Think about it all the fights, all the flirtations and secret glances it's like we've been secretly dating for years"

"Whatever I don't have time to stand here and talk about a relationship that never happened"

"One kiss that's all I ask. One kiss to show me you're not interested" Ashley laughed in his face before walking off

"You really are delusional"

--

She knew the one kiss Nick asked her for would tell her what she already knew. She liked Nick more than a friend and it could only escalate from there. She had never said the word No either if she remembered correctly.

"What's got you so off in la la land" Greg asked on their lunch break, an almost rarity that they seemed to have be taking the same break, she was always leaving when he was coming or vice versa.

"Nothing"

"Don't say it's not nothing you can tell brother Greg anything you know that"

"I think this is best kept secret for now"

"You're going back to New York with _him _aren't you?" why couldn't anyone say his name it wasn't like it was that hard to pronounce _Bosco Bos-co _not that hard.

"Judging by your lack of response it's true, so when do you leave?" her eyes shot up to the one person she didn't want to know she was leaving just yet. Nick had just walked in and from the look of hurt on his face he'd heard the last of the conversation. He got his coffee sipping it quietly adverting any glance that was in Ashley's direction and she looked down at the meal in front of her, instantly loosing her appetite. Her eyes didn't come off her food until Nick left and it was Greg who said something

"Well that was awkward what happened between you two?"

"Nothing" she threw her lunch in the trash; knowing if the questioning kept up she wouldn't be eating for the rest of the night

"Don't you have work to do?" she asked cleaning up her spotless spot.

"We still have another fifteen minutes on our lunch break"

"I'm going to get a head start on my case then" she smiled at Greg before leaving with a puzzled look on his face.

Just how was he going to get Ashley to tell him what's going on?

--

Ashley was searching for Sara when a hand grabbed her wrist pulling into the room she was recently walking by. Why did she always choose to go by the locker room and not go the other way. Note to self. GO THE LONG WAY next time. She was pushed up against the wall closest to the door. No one would see her. The familiar scent of Nick washed over her as his breath caused the tiny flyaway hairs to move.

"Don't go"

"Go where? Shifts not over for another three hours" her breathing had hitched with noticing just how much their bodies were touching.

"Don't go to New York" she did the mistake of looking up into his eyes and wanted nothing more to hug him at that moment. She did exactly that and he hugged her with a force that could only be deemed as he cared too much.

"It's not up to you" she whispered into his chest

"Please take your next break with me" he broke the hug holding her at arms length, his hands on her shoulders "Please" she nodded giving him the benefit of the doubt knowing no matter what she was going to New York for two weeks.

"Thank you" he kissed her forehead and was gone

From all of this it seemed like Nick didn't know she would be back in two weeks. She suddenly couldn't wait for next break.

--

"Wow I can not believe that" Ashley looked down at the paper she was holding and handed it back to Sara.

"I know" Sara tucked the sheet back into the folder collecting every photo and piece of evidence that had found a home on the examining table in the layout room.

"I guess the only thing now would be to take it to Brass" Ashley handed the pieces that Sara couldn't reach. Nick popped his head in the doorway, both ladies oblivious to him.

"Hey Ash you ready for that break now?" both heads popped up in his direction, Ashley's then went to Sara's who nodded.

"I can finish up here"

"Thanks I owe you" Ashley sealed her box of evidence and put the folder on top. Following Nick throughout the lab they finally found themselves out in smoker's pit of the lab where few actually went but it could be said it was there for the one or two smokers. Directing her to take a seat at the picnic table farthest away from the door, he sat beside her straddling the bench.

"Nick I think you-"

"Please just let me talk" his fingers on her mouth she nodded and he continued

"I don't want you to go to New York, I saw what he did to you the first time the months it took you to get over him"

"What are you talking about?" wither her pregnancy she really didn't have time to mend that broken little piece of her heart and eventually she got over it

"I saw the look when you thought no one was watching, the pained broken heart look. I've only had it once and that was when you told me you didn't want to see me anymore" If he wanted to go on and on about why she shouldn't go then she would simply leave out the fact she would be back in two weeks.

"You can say all you want but I'm going to New York there's no changing my mind. Lily deserves to know her father and he her" Looking defeated he turned to the table placing his head in his hands. She touched his shoulder making him jump.

"For what it was worth, I had a really nice time with you the other night and maybe there could have been something more but…" she trailed off not wanting to say anymore. He nodded in his hands. He understood.

She couldn't wait to see the look on his face when she came back.

--

"If we're going to New York together there has to be some ground rules" she told Bosco later that morning Lily sitting eating her Cheerios watching some morning cartoon, both Bosco and Ashley sat on the couch behind her.

"Ground Rules?"

"Yes like number one" Ashley grabbed the paper and pen sitting on her table and began writing "You cannot in anyway say "This is what it would have been like", "I want you to stay"

"Number two: There will be no touching intimately meaning no kissing, no touching any part of my body in a sexual manner"

"Number three: Lily and I will sleep together not you and I"

"Number four: these are not a set of rules to set a record to on how many you can break in the time frame"

"Number five: If you break any of these rules, Lily and I are out of your life for good. Understand?"

Bosco could only nod so much for trying to seduce her into staying.

--

The smile was gone.

On Ashley's last shift she saw Nick more than once and whenever they saw the other he was always smiling, always had that gleam in his eye but now today it was missing and he looked miserable. He'd snapped at people who looked at him the wrong way and even Greg when he asked what was wrong.

She was receiving dirty looks as if they knew she was the cause of this and to be brutally honest she was. There were countless times when she could have let it slip she would see him in two weeks but she'd kept her mouth shut in an attempt to hurt him. What kind of person did that? A not very nice one that was for sure. Greg was coming towards her at a neck breaking speed.

"You need to fix what ever you did" she only wished she could, she could always pick an meaningless argument with him but that would only leave him in a crankier mood.

She avoided Nick the rest of the shift; her excuse as to why he was still like this. She never saw him to fix it. It worked for only little while before she started to feel guilty.

Zipping up the last of the suitcases in a last minute attempt to see if everything was there she knew she couldn't put it off any longer. She had to see Nick and make things right.

"Hey Bos" she called from the bedroom, Bosco coming into see what was wrong.

"Could you watch Lily while I run some last minute errands?" did you really think she was going to tell her ex she was going to see the new flame? She didn't think so.

"Yea sure" he really didn't have much of a choice

"Thank You" with a smile and the grabbing of her purse she was gone.

--

She just hoped she got the address right. In all the times she'd been in Vegas not once had she been over to his house and that surprised her. The door opened to reveal one shirtless Nicholas Stokes.

"What do you want?" he asked and he looked as if he was in the midst of trying to get some sleep but ended up tossing and turning.

She didn't answer him but however stood up on tiptoe and kissed him, wrapping her arms around his neck. It didn't take Nick long to jump in and pull her closer against him to feel all of him. She let him pull her in closing the door with one hand while the other in her hair in an attempt to bring her head closer to his.


End file.
